Projects 1 to 4 (And What They Taught Me)

A creative career is built on risk, failure, and figuring it out as you go

Failure is scary – for creatives, and for most people really.

This year has been a year of ‘brave’ choices for me—and it continues to be. Are the choices really that brave? In the grand context of things, not really. But they do represent risk.

Very briefly, a little bit about me. I’m the eldest daughter of an immigrant mother from a lower socio-economic background. I’m also a first-generation university student. The first in my entire family to go to uni.

Does that matter, you might wonder? It does. People like me are taught from very early on to be risk averse. Stability is the key. It’s about keeping your head down, not making waves and keeping a steady salary coming in.

It is a catastrophe to mothers like mine, for me to pursue a creative career. (It’s okay, she’s mostly come around… mostly. I’m 37.)

Why am I telling you all of this? I guess I’m saying this because for a creative like myself, my version of ‘being brave’ might be something that seems relatively tame, but it takes a lot of convincing to tell myself that it’s okay to take risks. It takes a lot of convincing to tell myself that if the risk doesn’t pan out, it’s not a failure. It’s a lesson and an opportunity to pivot.

As a Career Advisor it’s easier for me to assess these risks and provide neutral guidance to others. It’s much less easy to do the same for myself.

At the moment I’m in the middle of launching four projects that, if successful, will lead to the diversification of my income. All while balancing a full-time job and planning my next novel which I hope will have a chance of going on submission (publishing is tough right now!).

Here are their current statuses:

Project #1 – no takers, complete bust, back to the drawing board
Project #2 – no takers, need to reconsider marketing strategy
Project #3 – enthusiastic interest, limited follow-through from interested parties, pivot needed
Project #4 – still underway, initial results pending (has also required financial investment so even scarier if it doesn’t take off!)

Funnily enough, when #1 fell completely flat on its face, the person most upset by it was my mum. Her reaction was actually quite heart warming. It was nice to see someone recognise the time and effort I had put into something and be indignant on my behalf when she felt people didn’t respect that. (Thanks mum <3)

I’m not going to lie, it is and can be extremely demoralising, especially if you’re someone who needs to create alongside a full-time job just to make ends meet and ensure you can afford to continue your creative practice, whatever your practice may be.

It’s interesting that many of the people I have supported on their creative career journey simply don’t plan for reality of not making it big right off the bat. To be clear, I don’t discourage anyone I speak with. It is absolutely possible to ‘make it’ right away.

It might be worth challenging what ‘making it’ actually means.

Publishing a book that doesn’t hit the bestseller list but still finds readers? A success.

Not being famous but having a small, loyal audience that keeps showing up for your work? A success.

Getting a grant, a residency, or a commission that lets you focus on your craft – even if just for a little while – that’s success too.

All of these are examples of ‘making it’.

In the past year, whilst working on the final book of my Inspector Reis series for Hodder & Stoughton, it is the closest I’ve ever come to genuinely considering not pursuing this anymore.

I was severely sleep deprived (not helpful for rational decision making), navigating difficult challenges at work and in my personal life, I had deadlines I was late for, and more deadlines hovering over my head. Somehow, though, I got that book written and delivered. I’m also 100% sure I’m not quitting writing. Honestly, it’s the toxic love of my life.

Again, you’re wondering why I’m telling you all this.

Well, I guess, if like me, you’re still out there trying and failing, and getting up and trying again, I want to encourage you to keep going.

Failure is never actually failure. Because you always learn something right? And I think that’s one of the best things I’ve learned.

Maybe with projects #1 - #3 I have not gotten the result I’ve wanted, but I can promise you I have 100% upskilled. I have more knowledge now and that will inform my next steps and little by little, my chances of failure grow smaller and my chances of success grow bigger.

There’s a Japanese saying that is really appropriate for this piece… and it was featured in Naruto (unsurprising if you know me and my love of manga):

努力は裏切らない
Effort never betrays you.

So keep trying. The creative world is whacky—doesn’t even make sense most of the time—but it’s worth it.

To wrap up this post (which I write as I follow through on making a majorly scary decision), I want to link you to a TED talk I come back to often:

Grit: The Power of Passion and Perseverance | Angela Lee Duckworth
Watch here:

I'm a UK-based career advisor and published author, specialising in helping creatives and career changers navigate work that doesn’t always follow a straight path. I offer CV and cover letter feedback tailored to the UK job market, plus 1:1 careers advice via Zoom. You can find all my services here: https://ko-fi.com/patriciamarques